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By the way: Educate us before educating a Male Child

Posted on:  | 25 Oct 2016

Don't get surprised to read this. Everyone is talking about educating Girl Child and here I am talking in a different way.
It's really important to understand the purpose of writing this article.

Unfortunately gender discrimination starts from our home only. We have been grown up with a notion that girls are weaker sex. Boys start making fun of girls and comment on their body parts which becomes a regular habit. Sometimes they try to over power girls with violence. Some stuff is just unacceptable. If we share jokes on female bodies and pass on to others, our kids quickly learn how to disrespect females at an early age.

We can easily blame men for their wrong perspective. When Sunny leone dances or performs, males watch her with eagle eyes. Is this natural or males have learnt from us?

My aim was to get justice for women–in every possible way even though I always understood that the only solution is to educate us before educating a male child. But until such time as women and men have financial, social, economic and political equality, how could this be possible?
Our kids become what we are, not what we say. Lecturing and teaching them doesn’t work. They learn from us by watching what we do.

As mothers, our job is to love and respect ourselves and other women. Our kids listen to how we talk about our own bodies and how we speak about other women and girls. Our self-loathing and gendered criticism trickles into our sons and daughters and is powerfully undermining of building respect. Our kids imbibe sexual attitudes–not only from mainstream culture–but also through the subtleties of how comfortable we are with our own sexuality. If we talk about sex as something natural and mutual, our sons also learn to take it naturally.

Our boys and girls can learn to say they are proudly ‘feminist’ because they believe men and women should be treated equally which is not to say that gender differences should be ignored–in certain instances affirmative action might be an important reparative step in achieving that equality.
No matter how intelligent, successful or classy a male is, he always treats a female weaker than himself. It's not about how good person you are until you learn to respect females. Raising boys means making sure that the adult men in your life treat you right. You ultimately want your son to see what you consider to be the standard for how a man should treat women. Show him how important it is to always be a friend to women and listen to their problems. Even if it’s about a fight he had with a girlfriend and he doesn’t really get it, teach him to listen, ask questions, and always take her side.

Boys need to learn the basics like how to run the dishwasher, washing machine and the vacuum. Helping out around the house is a great way to show affection to someone who might be feeling sick or overwhelmed. No one likes a helpless dude. Make him learn the basics of kitchen and culinary art.

Make sure he knows that lying is the ultimate deal breaker. Women are good at picking up on lies, and while the truth may sometimes have negative repercussions, a lie always will.
You are a role model to your kids so always do what you preach them.

And the best way is to laugh with your kids. Laughter is the best way to build resilience. Life is serious, but we don’t need to take ourselves too seriously. We can laugh at ourselves–with all our mistakes, foibles, imperfections and failures, and in so doing, our kids will learn to do the same.
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